Help! I'm trapped in 1862 and can't seem to get out.

All day today I've tried to make it to 2003 and forces beyond my control kept insisting that it was 1862.

At one point I had a reporter on the line asking about what was going on 141 years ago, a historian on the other line wanting to discuss my omission of John Bankhead Magruder from a list, and a reenactor in my office wanting to know what he and his wife should wear to the upcoming ball, and whether or not he should bring his ropemaking equipment (the dance and ropemaking are tangentially related - but no, they will not be occurring at the same time!).

Then I had someone else wanting to discuss the dimensions of the CSS Virginia's casemate, and another person inquiring whether or not it was William Kline or William Cline that served on that glorious vessel.

Anybody wanna know about Stanislas Dupuy de Lome?

Good. Don't ask.